Stone Cold Bloggin', 12/5/07

A quick follow up to my earlier BCS post. As you can tell from my bottom line predictions, I think the BCS got the correct two teams given the system that we have in place. My problem is not with the system (although a nice 8 or 16 team playoff would be a welcome sight), but rather with pretty much ALL of the teams that are in the BCS "conversation". These teams all had chances to seize the moment over the last month or so and not only did nobody step up, but some of these so-called heavyweights shriveled up in historic fashion. Ohio State? You got Zooked. At home. In November. LSU? They washed the taste of Darren McFadden out of their mouths just in time to win Saturday. (Note: Notre Dame has a longer current winning streak -- two -- than either BCS championship participant.) Oklahoma? We can excuse one loss to an unranked team, maybe. Two? Well, have fun in Glendale. Georgia? Kansas? Win your division, then maybe we can talk. Missouri? Bastards. If you or West Virginia had just taken care of business, than none of this is an issue. Granted, we'd have had Missouri in the title game, but I would have at least not needed to be medicated on the air on Monday. And speaking of West Virginia .... Rich Rodriguez, don't even look at me. Seriously, you're in "time out". You got beat by a guy with a caterpillar on his face. At home. In November. Getting Wannied is WAY worse than getting Zooked. Indeed, across the board ... NO STONES in college football this season.

Come to think of it, screw Ohio State and LSU. Neither of you deserve it. We're going with undefeated Hawaii against Tim Tebow in the BCS title game. And no, I don't mean Hawaii against Florida, I mean Hawaii against Tim Tebow. Tim Tebow taking on all of Hawaii by himself. And not just the football team but the entire population of Hawaii. Crushing all of their heads with his bare hands, ravaging all of their luaus, and then using a palm tree as a tooth pick. Tim Tebow is a superhero. He could do it.

Ok, now a gaggle of videos and links to keep you occupied while you should be working:

• "Suddenly" Suzyn Waldman (the faux Suzyn) has a take on this whole Johan Santana thing. [Hugging Harold Reynolds]. (By the way, if you want to hear the time Johnny Harris and I completely and utterly clowned Suzyn Waldman, click here and then here.)
  
• Those Oscar de la Hoya photos of him in fishnet - unfortunately, it sounds like they were fake. [Macho Chip]
• Best redneck picture page of all time. [Redneck page]
• Maybe the most disturbing Charlie Weis photoshop job of all time. [With Leather]
• This guy likes Jimmy Dean sausage a little too much. Be sure to listen to the very end. [Filecabi.net]
• A site dedicated to the wind beneath all of our wings -- Coach Eddie O. [EDSBL]
• Why the Titans have the worst nickname in sports. [AOL Funhouse]

VIDEO TIME!

Who makes less sense? Emmitt Smith .....



.... or the Ultimate Warrior.

(NOTE: Stuart Scott is an acceptable write-in vote based purely on his horrific use of the word "bananas" at the beginning of the Emmitt clip.)

HEY, LET'S DO MORE VIDEOS!

If you don't have enough money to buy the Rocky DVD box set, this video actually summarizes the entire Rocky series -- all SIX movies in about 24 seconds! A real time saver!



You remember Schoolhouse Rock? The five minute Saturday morning vignettes about harmless subjects like adjectives, simple math, and the Constitution? Well, apparently this is what Schoolhouse Rock would be if it were still around today. Awesome!


For those of you who have a phobia about sitting on strange toilet seats, this contraption is a godsend.



FINALLY, A BIG LOU HOLTZ FINALE!!

This might be Lou Holtz's finest hour. I'd love to see him give this speech to the Knicks. Would they even take their headphones off?

"If you were committed to excellence, and if you care about the Knicks and about the fans, and the people that sacrifice to buy those tickets ... then you would give maximum effort!"

Maybe so. I guess we need to get them committed to that there excellence thing first, Coach. something we've been trying to do for the last, oh, 50 years.