Stone Cold Bloggin', 3/2/08

Ok, I'll admit it. I'm starting to become a believer in the Yao-less Rockets. The wins over Washington and Memphis were nice (and necessary), but the fact is neither of those teams has a big guy that puts any sort of scare into you. Brendan Haywood? Kwame Brown? Whatever. In other words, a frontcourt of Dikembe for 20 minutes and the dreaded, two-headed Sco-Landrinator is more than enough to get you to the pay window. This Nuggets win is an obvious cut above the first two, for a couple reasons. First and foremost, the Nuggets are in that mix of teams (along with Golden State, Dallas, Phoenix, and New Orleans) that the Rockets will be presumably duking it out with for survival at season's end, so a win against anyone in that group takes on larger importance than beating up on the Grizz or the Wiz. Second, this was another game where the Rockets got a first half lead and proceeded to put their foot on the opposition's esophagus, and in this case an opponent who has the weapons to mount a second half charge. That charge never came.

I probably need to stop waiting for Shane to quit hitting three's, for Rafer to turn into a pumpkin, and for the team to issue a press release saying T-Mac will miss the next ten games with a floor burn, and just enjoy this ride. The seeds are being planted for a pretty sweet NBA story if the Rockets can make a run into the post season. Except for the Lakers, Spurs, and maybe the Jazz, you can make a case for the re-conifigured, post-Yao Rockets being a better team than any of the other teams in the West. Hell, it looks like the Suns (clearly) and Mavericks (possibly) have actually made themselves worse with their big trades. I'm not saying the Rockets are definitively better than these teams, it's too early to tell. I'm just saying there is an argument, which frankly is a lot more than most of us (my hand is raised) were willing to concede a few days ago.

Circle March 6. The Rockets go to Dallas on the tail end of a back-to-back. If we're talking about win #17 in a row in Thursday night, it's on.

Now for some Monday time wasters ...

LINKS

• Many a tale from NFL Combines past [The Sports Hernia]
• Bas Rutten has an e-card for everyone that is interested in the new movie "Never Back Down", a/k/a Karate Kid 2008 [Never Back Down]
• Rutgers tries to maintain its spot in college football relevancy via the old fashioned way -- new fangled mouthguards. [Wizard of Odds]
• Pittsburgh's PNC Park, last in baseball, first in eating! Yes, those four magic words -- ALL YOU CAN EAT! [Bugs and Cranks]
• WWE Action Figure test (sadly, I scored 100%). [Mental Floss]
• Early gauge on the Coach's Hot Seat -- it's Ty Willingham in the lead! [Coaches Hot Seat]
• The Koncak League! An idea that is long overdue. [TY Sports]
• A Boise high school football player is suing Hawaii over revoking a scholarship offer. Believed to be the first time this has happened. What took so long? [Wizard of Odds]
• Breaking down the Terrelle Pryor sweepstakes [Detroit Free Press]
  

VIDEOS

This one is an oldie but a goodie. Be patient, there is a pay off at the end, and it involves a heavy set reporter wailing like Chewbacca in a bondage rack.



And here is the animated version ...



And the remake ...



How to get ahead in the weatherman universe? Act the fool, like Mark Mathis ....



I love old Sopranos clips. This is one of the greatest scenes in the history of the series. Actually, if you think about the whole Mitchell Report saga, imagine Clemens as Tony, Pettitte as Paulie Walnuts, Chuck Knoblauch as Silvio, and McNamee as Big Pussy. Don't you think there is part of Roger that wishes he found out McNamee had ratted him out to the Feds early enough to take him boat shopping?



Borseth vs Gundy rants. I think rants have now jumped the shark, don't you?

Stone Cold Bloggin', 1/25/08

QUESTION: What do you get when you cross a ridiculously self-indulgent event like the Mike and Mike Roast with a somewhat horse-faced ESPN host and a full bottle of vodka?

ANSWER: A whole lotta f-bomb laced vitriol for Notre Dame, a one week suspension, and lots of public ridicule.

Dana Jacobson was suspended by ESPN last week for a drunken tirade that included the words "F--- NOTRE DAME! ... F--- TOUCHDOWN JESUS! ... F--- JESUS!" Naturally, this raised the ire of pretty much everyone outside of USC and Michigan fans (who all wholeheartedly agree with her even if they contend that they don't ... I know better ... liars!!) My favorite parts of this whole fiasco:

(1) ESPN actually came up with an idea (the Mike and Mike Roast) that was executed even more poorly than "Who's Now?"

(2) Jacobson's apology, which included this doozy:

"I am sorry. My remarks about Notre Dame were foolish and insensitive. I respect all religions and did not mean anything derogatory by my poorly chosen words. I also deeply regret the embarrassment I've caused ESPN and Mike and Mike."

Yeah, because the last thing that Mike and Mike would ever do is get near anything that would embarrass them ...


No, not at all ....

Ok, now some time wasters for those of you who are looking to either extend your weekend or work your way back into the job slowly on a Monday ...

LINKS

• Check out the automatic complaint letter generator, a real time saver! [Scott Pakin]
• Some riff-raff found their way onto the Big East coaches' conference call this week. Uh oh ... [Awful Announcing]
• Amazing story about Dax Crum, a one-handed college basketball player. [The Big Lead]
• The 1972 Dolphins are a bunch of delusional old men ... it's now confirmed. [FoxSports]
• A comprehensive list of all of the things that made Dr. David Bruce Banner "hulk out" on "The Incredible Hulk". Informative. [KennethJohnson]
• The Cubs marketing department needs to do some more research. [Deadspin]
• Mike Adamle of American Gladiators fame is going to be joining the WWE as a backstage announcer. Kick his ass, Mean Gene! That's YOUR gig!! [411mania.com]
• When someone puts together a list of reasons to hate the Utah Jazz? Well, count me in! [The Dream Shake]
  

VIDEOS

Got this one from Deadspin, this might be the worst (and by worst, I mean best) athlete car endorsement commercial of all-time ....



I mean, Papelbon is close ....



Ah, who am I kidding? NOBODY beats the DC area athletes pimping Eastern Motors!!



And speaking of horrible advertisements, let's take a trip in the WAY BACK machine and check out a young George Costanza gallivanting around the streets of some happy city and telling us about the McDLT ....



I guess that's an improvement over the original McDonald's commercials. And people wonder why kids are afraid of clowns ...



Enough with the ad's. Now a public service announcement. Kids, DO NOT try this at home!!



Had this one sent to me by no fewer than a couple dozen listeners. The downfall of the Cowboys. Very funny ....

Stone Cold Bloggin', 1/5/08

First, I want to thank the crew from the Hugging Harold Reynolds blog for organizing and including the Sports Kolache in the NFL Playoffs Fantasy Football contest, where twenty blogs and highly acclaimed blog dwellers will battle for the most illustrious piece of hardware in our business .... seen below ....
For what it's worth, my favorite blog name amongst the competitors? The Lazy Eye of Stuart Scott. If you're looking to start a blog and come up with a catchy name, there's your benchmark.

As Todd Collins runs for his life in Seattle, here are a few time wasters of the link and video variety to get you through this January weekend ...

LINKS

• Wizard of Odds contends something that I've espoused all season -- the SEC is good but not the monster everyone thinks it is. [Wizard of Odds]
• A list of Pat Summerall's announcing screw-ups from Tuesday's Cotton Bowl. Get comfy. [Kansas City Star]
• A most excellent divorce story that yields this shocker -- South Florida football players cheat! No way! Nick Saban must feel vindicated. [Every Day Should Be Saturday]
• And while we're talking about South Florida, here's a link to some pics of a USF cheerleader's Myspace exploits. Gotta love Myspace. [Busted Coverage]
  
• I liked the Kyle Korver trade for the Utah Jazz. I think he's just the type of spot up shooter they need to open things up for Boozer inside. There's a Sixers fan (presumably) who's not as psyched about the deal. HILARIOUS VIDEO ALERT. [Awful Announcing]
• A very helpful flow chart if you are deciding whether or not to eat bacon. [Beer or Kid]
• An Erin Andrews tribute that makes mine look like child's play. [Barstool Sports]
• Worst hairstyles in movies (although I think they were a little hard on the Padme-Leia mother-daughter combo). [Yahoo]
• Speaking of the Skywalker family, if any of you know where I can buy one of these Vader heads, let me know ... because, you know, the Force is strong in my family and shit. [Imperial Holocron]
• Top 25 Sexiest Athletes of 2007. HOT CHICK ALERT. Although no Sue Bird on the list does detract from their credibility. [Coed Magazine]

VIDEOS

Thanks to the good folks at the My Meat on Your Grill tailgater at Texans games, I'd like to think that Harris and I are out in front of this "Beer Pong is the sport of the new millenium" trend. Here is a video about the World Series of Beer Pong ...

Next, I'm sure that most of you have seen this bone-jarring, teeth-dislodging hit on the Titans' Chris Henry by Darrell Reid of the Colts ....



I'm hoping that maybe this video of rugby hits (NOTE: NO PADS) will make Chris Henry and his family feel a little bit better ....



If they ever decide to do a Sesame Street movie with actual people playing the part of Muppets, this video should sew up the campaign for Pesci and DeNiro as Ernie and Bert, respectively ....




Staying with the mob theme, and in honor of Robert Loggia's 78th birthday this week, here is a recap of the Paulie vs Feech Lawn Wars from 2004 on the Sopranos ....

Stone Cold Bloggin', X-mas Style 12/24/07

SEASON'S GREETINGS! (Or as Michael Scott might say, SKI-SON'S GREETINGS .... sorry I couldn't find a picture of the card Michael made when he photoshopped his face onto his girlfriend's ex-husband's face in a ski trip picture with her family.)
















HO!













HO!










HO!













PIMP!

PIMPIN' AIN'T EASY!!!

All right, I'll be back in full swing doing some posts in a couple days, but in the meantime here are some videos and links to keep you busy.

VIDS!

Staying with the theme of Michael Scott, here is an outstanding Michael Scott Tribute video done to Five for Fighting's "Superman" ....



I'm not a huge fan of hip hop. I dabble a little bit, but for the most part rap music gives me quite the inferiority complex, seeing as I don't have a pimped out ride, a pimped out crib, 1000 ho's on speed dial, or even a posse. But finally there is a rap for us, the Everyday Normal Guy. FINALLY, SOMEBODY SAID WHAT NEEDED TO BE SAID!!!

Check this one out. Apparently, an Arkansas TV station had a guest on their show who was trying to help make Bobby Petrino look like less of a scumbag by telling a story about how Coach Carpetbag visited his son in the hospital after his son was mauled by a dog. Be patient and wait for the runaway winner for Insensitive Comment of the Year by whoever the anchorman buffoon is.

LINKS!

• Grading coaches on a Saban Scale. I like it. [CNNSI.com]
• I'm a sucker for anything that highlights the stereotypes of old school wrestling gimmicks. One nitpick - they left out the token "Samoan with head so hard that head butts have no effect on them", for which I'd have chosen Afa. Wild Samoan #1. [Food Court Lunch]
• Woman arrested for flashing the jumbotorn at Grizzlies game. And I thought Kisscam couldn't be topped. [Awful Announcing]
• Want to know what your "one word Brazilian name" would be? Click here. [Minimals World]
• Floyd Mayweather kisses and makes up with the Oompa Loompas. [TMZ]
• There is a blog whose name is attributed to Festivus. Needless to say, it is now stored on my netvibes. [Airing of the Grievances]
• Anyone looking for fuel to the fire that the SEC may be a tad overrated. I'm not sayin', I'm just sayin' [Wizard of Odds]
• NFL draft preview season is now upon us, where every Mel, Todd, and Petey will crank out their mock drafts, updated by the minute or whenever one of the top 300 prospects breaks wind, whichever happens first. Here's one man's opinion of the top 32. [CBS Sportsline]

Merry Christmas to all and to those of you in Canada a very happy Boxing Day!

Stone Cold Bloggin', 12/14/07

It sounds like Andy Pettitte has come clean about his use of Human Growth Hormone saying that he used it twice in 2002 to speed up his recovery from an elbow injury. I'm not entirely surprised at Pettitte's admission. By all accounts, he's a decent guy and probably sensitive to whatever criticism was continuing to fester until he answered the allegations in the Mitchell Report. Good for him for admitting it, apologizing to those who feel like they needed an apology, and moving on.

How this effects his legacy remains to be seen. I think the public will be forgiving, especially when you juxtapose Pettitte's accountability next to others' silence or denials (more on that in a minute). As for the Hall of Fame, Pettitte was a borderline case even before all of this came up. His stats and accomplishments are very similar to Curt Schilling's, and Pettitte probably will end up pitching a few more years than Schilling (and presumably pile up more wins). (That's not to say that Schilling is a definite Hall of Famer, but I think people debate about Schilling's inclusion more than they do Pettitte and my point is that if you think Schilling is a Hall of Famer, then Pettitte is right there, too.)

The juicier subplot in Pettitte's admission is what this does to his BFF, Roger Clemens. Clemens' denial is pretty steadfast in that it appears he is saying that the Mitchell Report is bunk and that he hasn't taken steroids or any performance enhancing drugs at all. EVER. It also paints Brian McNamee as sort of a government rat, trying to avoid federal prosecution by throwing Clemens under the bus. Now Pettitte is essentially validating the couple of pages in the Mitchell Report that pertained to him, and along with it he is validating McNamee, at least as pertains to his dealings with him. So are we to believe that McNamee was telling the truth about his dealings with Pettitte, but was completely fabricating everything about Clemens? That's a hard one to swallow. I'm not indicting Roger yet, but one more big brick in the wall fell out today.

Also, I found David Justice's appearence on the Colin Cowherd show on Friday quite hilarious. If you didn't hear it, Justice spent the entire appearance trying to refute the allegations in the Mitchell Report, which consisted of Kirk Radomski selling him HGH after the 2000 World Series, and Justice discussing HGH with Brian McNamee during his time with the Yankees. Part of Justice's self-defense consisted of basically trash talking himself, citing his shitty performance in 2001 (.246, 18 HR, 51 RBI in 111 games) as proof that there's no way he could've been on any performance-enhancing drugs. I just found it very humorous that for years some players have campaigned for their inclusion in the Baseball Hall of Fame by citing their superior stats, and now in 2007 we have players citing their dog shit stats to try and gain figurative exclusion from the Mitchell Report. Strange days, indeed.

Ok, now onto some time wasters for all of you ....

LINKS (I won't sleep until one of you gets fired)

• Anna Rawson, Aussie model and golfer, just qualified for the LPGA! Women's golf just became more watchable. [Golf Now]
• A study at BYU (!) indicates that young women are more accepting of porn. (And in a related story, applications for admission at BYU quadruple.) [Salt Lake City Tribune]
• An interesting angle on Kevin Young's steroid use. (Damn, whatever happened to that guy?) [Where is Andy Van Slyke]
• ADDICTIVE GAME ALERT - If you get fired for playing this nine hours a day at work, don;t blame me. I warned you. [The Map Game]
• The 33 best Beer Pong tables ever created. Totally sweet. [Pongalong]
• Jerry Jones interhects himself into the Arkansas coaching search. (Satire alert) [College Game Balls]
• The 9 Most Humiliating Sports Moments on video. [Holy Taco]

VIDEO (as if the drunk chick post below wasn't enough)

BEFORE THEY WERE STARS EDITION!!!

DICK VITALE
Check out Dick Vitale back in 1986! I believe the thick windows attached to his head are his glasses. It's strange seeing him so calm and measured in his analysis. If you've ever wondered what 2007 Dickie V would be like if were sedated in a dentist's chair, go ahead and play this video. (Youtube disabled embedding this video into my blog so click here to view it.)

SIMON COWELL
Before he became the resident curmudgeon on "American Idol", Simon Cowell was a contestant on the UK version of "Sale of the Century". I have to admit, dude is pretty smooth and in control even back then. (They've disabled embedding on this video, too -- what are you people afraid of?? -- anyway, click here to watch it.)

TIGER WOODS
A two year old Tiger Woods shows up on the Mike Douglas Show and whacks one 300 yards down the middle (or however far back the stage went). This clip is only 36 seconds long so it leaves out the part where he makes out with a two year old Elin Nordegren afterwards.





MATT LEBLANC
This is supposedly a Heinz ketchup commercial that LeBlanc did before he became Joey on "Friends", but this is so stupid I think it may have actually been an episode of "Friends".





Now get back to work!!

Stone Cold Bloggin', 12/7/07

A few thoughts as the baseball winter meetings become smaller in our rear view mirror:

The two big stories coming out of the meetings (Cabrera and Willis to Detroit, the ongoing "Where is Johan Santana going?" saga) further illustrate the chasm that still exists between the handful of "haves" sitting atop the revenue mountain, and the many species of "have nots" (ranging from the semi-destitute ball clubs like Minnesota to the rancid, flea-ridden homeless like Florida). I know that in the last two years we've seen 15 different teams make the playoffs, but in the end when the revenue pie gets bigger, it still becomes cost prohibitive/reckless for the mid-revenue/low-revenue ball clubs to keep their marquee guys. It's this dynamic that forces the have-nots to have baseball IQ's that virtually double their big market counterparts, and it's this dynamic that allows a dolt like Hank Steinbrenner to run a team that will be one of the odds-on favorites to win it all in 2008. (Of course, in the last eleven years, the Florida Marlins have won as many World Series as the Mets, Dodgers, Angels, White Sox, and Cubs combined so what the hell do I know.)

The Cabrera/Willis-to-Detroit trade was one of those fun "holy shit!" initial reaction trades, where as a baseball fan you immediately start scrambling for Detroit's roster so you can start constructing their opening day lineup. "Mother of God!....Granderson .... Polanco .... Cabrera .... Ordonez .... Sheffield ..... Guillen .... I-Rod .... whoever's playing left .... damn, they're gonna have Renteria in the f--ing NINE HOLE!" And then once you get past that, you realize that even with Willis they still don't have the pitching juice to overtake Boston (or Cleveland, for that matter). Check out the 2007 ERA's of the top four in Detroit's 2008 rotation:

Verlander 3.66
Willis 5.17
Bonderman 5.01
Rogers 4.43 (and a year's worth of injuries)

I'll take the front of the Red Sox and Indians' rotations over that every day and twice on Sundays. And this also doesn't begin to scratch the surface on the Tigers' bullpen issues, which still persist (and are exacerbated by the injury to Joel Zumaya).

Finally, what is the over/under on average attendance for the Florida Marlins this season? 8,000? 7,000? 4,500? Seriously, why would they even play home games? I think the Marlins need to just scrap the whole "Florida" thing and just get a sponsor and turn into one of those barnstorming teams where their whole year consists of road games and they travel from town to town on a motor coach bus. You know, one of those rigs with a phone booth sized bathroom in the back where you get hit with the pungent smell of other people's waste if your within ten rows of the back of the bus? The Marlin Express baby! They'd be like the Globetrotters! The Harlem Marlins! Josh Willingham could throw buckets of confetti at the umpires; Hanley Ramirez and Dan Uggla could turn double plays by using some fancy, behind the back flip throws, the melodious "Sweet Georgia Brown" playing in the background the entire time of course. Totally sweet.

Now some time wasters, because the economy is doing a little too well ....

LINKS

• The drive time shows at 1560 have been ELFED!!! Merry Christmas, Gamers!!! [Elf Yourself]
  
• About the only good thing left about Sportscenter is the hilarious commercials for Sportscenter. Here is the latest one. [Awful Announcing]
• SI compares the BCS contenders to pro wrestlers, which is right up my alley. The only thing missing is some sweet youtube clips. [SI Quick Slants]
• This was sent to me by an LSU fan, with the email "An Ohio State fan learns about golf." Neal, this is just wrong. Click here.
• A string of Jon Scheyer photoshops that are ... well, don't view this string while drinking anything or your keyboard will get soaked. [Scout.com]
• Peter King reveals his true feelings for Brett Favre [Kissing Suzy Kolber]
• Credit card theft taunts at Doug Gottlieb in an online chat. Like I'm not gonna put up a link to that. [Deadspin]
• A 2008 Heisman forecast that doesn't include Tim Tebow. Not smart. He'll fry this guy with bolts of lightning from his eyes. [Heisman Pundit]
  

VIDS!

Congrats to Missouri QB Chase Daniel for getting the invite to New York City for the Heisman Trophy awards ceremony. He's had many fine performances this season, but none better than this ....



Which brings us to Kentucky freshman Pat Patterson, who upped the ante and actually ate one DURING the game ....



BRAVO.

MORE VIDS!

When I was a kid, Kermit the Frog sang songs like "It's Not Easy Being Green" and "Rainbow Connection". It appears that with the death of Jim Henson, he's gotten in touch with hsi dark side and significantly edgier ....



Melissa Theuriau almost makes me want to move to France. I like at the 0:30 mark where she mentions President "George Boosh"...


They are in the Division 1-AA semifinals, folks ... Appalchian State! And they are HOT HOT HOT!! Best video ever ... and by best, I mean worst ...

Stone Cold Bloggin', 12/5/07

A quick follow up to my earlier BCS post. As you can tell from my bottom line predictions, I think the BCS got the correct two teams given the system that we have in place. My problem is not with the system (although a nice 8 or 16 team playoff would be a welcome sight), but rather with pretty much ALL of the teams that are in the BCS "conversation". These teams all had chances to seize the moment over the last month or so and not only did nobody step up, but some of these so-called heavyweights shriveled up in historic fashion. Ohio State? You got Zooked. At home. In November. LSU? They washed the taste of Darren McFadden out of their mouths just in time to win Saturday. (Note: Notre Dame has a longer current winning streak -- two -- than either BCS championship participant.) Oklahoma? We can excuse one loss to an unranked team, maybe. Two? Well, have fun in Glendale. Georgia? Kansas? Win your division, then maybe we can talk. Missouri? Bastards. If you or West Virginia had just taken care of business, than none of this is an issue. Granted, we'd have had Missouri in the title game, but I would have at least not needed to be medicated on the air on Monday. And speaking of West Virginia .... Rich Rodriguez, don't even look at me. Seriously, you're in "time out". You got beat by a guy with a caterpillar on his face. At home. In November. Getting Wannied is WAY worse than getting Zooked. Indeed, across the board ... NO STONES in college football this season.

Come to think of it, screw Ohio State and LSU. Neither of you deserve it. We're going with undefeated Hawaii against Tim Tebow in the BCS title game. And no, I don't mean Hawaii against Florida, I mean Hawaii against Tim Tebow. Tim Tebow taking on all of Hawaii by himself. And not just the football team but the entire population of Hawaii. Crushing all of their heads with his bare hands, ravaging all of their luaus, and then using a palm tree as a tooth pick. Tim Tebow is a superhero. He could do it.

Ok, now a gaggle of videos and links to keep you occupied while you should be working:

• "Suddenly" Suzyn Waldman (the faux Suzyn) has a take on this whole Johan Santana thing. [Hugging Harold Reynolds]. (By the way, if you want to hear the time Johnny Harris and I completely and utterly clowned Suzyn Waldman, click here and then here.)
  
• Those Oscar de la Hoya photos of him in fishnet - unfortunately, it sounds like they were fake. [Macho Chip]
• Best redneck picture page of all time. [Redneck page]
• Maybe the most disturbing Charlie Weis photoshop job of all time. [With Leather]
• This guy likes Jimmy Dean sausage a little too much. Be sure to listen to the very end. [Filecabi.net]
• A site dedicated to the wind beneath all of our wings -- Coach Eddie O. [EDSBL]
• Why the Titans have the worst nickname in sports. [AOL Funhouse]

VIDEO TIME!

Who makes less sense? Emmitt Smith .....



.... or the Ultimate Warrior.

(NOTE: Stuart Scott is an acceptable write-in vote based purely on his horrific use of the word "bananas" at the beginning of the Emmitt clip.)

HEY, LET'S DO MORE VIDEOS!

If you don't have enough money to buy the Rocky DVD box set, this video actually summarizes the entire Rocky series -- all SIX movies in about 24 seconds! A real time saver!



You remember Schoolhouse Rock? The five minute Saturday morning vignettes about harmless subjects like adjectives, simple math, and the Constitution? Well, apparently this is what Schoolhouse Rock would be if it were still around today. Awesome!


For those of you who have a phobia about sitting on strange toilet seats, this contraption is a godsend.



FINALLY, A BIG LOU HOLTZ FINALE!!

This might be Lou Holtz's finest hour. I'd love to see him give this speech to the Knicks. Would they even take their headphones off?

"If you were committed to excellence, and if you care about the Knicks and about the fans, and the people that sacrifice to buy those tickets ... then you would give maximum effort!"

Maybe so. I guess we need to get them committed to that there excellence thing first, Coach. something we've been trying to do for the last, oh, 50 years.

Stone Cold Bloggin', 11/20/07

JoePa could use LifeCall.





Some links if you're looking to waste some time:

• Several people who are NOT master of their domain. [Dailymotion]
• A long overdue feature - tracking Dick Vitale's verbal diarrhea. [Awful Announcing]
• It's Christmas shopping season. Buy A-Rod's used nuthuggers for that special someone. [Deadspin]
• Apparently, there's a method to winning Monopoly that involves hording the railroads. Who knew? [Amnesta]
• A-Rod is a great American. Not really. [Sons of Sam Malone]
• An outstanding breakdown of the Heisman trophy race with the candidates as Pulp fiction characters. [Cake Rocks the Party]

Stone Cold Bloggin', 11/07/07

Seven links and seven vids for all you kids out there on a lazy Wednesday night.... like Coach Mangino, pick one!

LINKS

• What do you get when you allow plumbers, salespeople, washed up athletes, and the homeless to decide the fate of the BCS? Why, the Harris Poll of course! Who is your favorite pollster? [Epic Carnival]
• Trev Alberts picked Alabama this past weekend. He was wrong. He admits to being "dumb". He is right. [CSTV]
• A reminder that baseball writers sometimes are not very smart. Undeserving MVP's. [Vegas Watch]
• Pick the Worst Sports Announcer, March Madness bracket style. And please, please, PLEASE vote for Chris Berman!!! [Awful Announcing]
• John Harris and I were wondering why anyone would pay A-Rod $30M when they could probably lock up Miggy Cabrera for half that. We're not alone [The Big Lead]
• Kige Ramsey has a plan to make America powerful again. It's time we all sat up and listened. [Bottomless Chips]
• QUALITY CRAPPER READING ALERT! A preview of every free agent in baseball this offseason. [Cake Rocks The Party]
  

VIDS

• Auburn DC Will Muschamp is going to be a hot name when coaching jobs open up in the next month. Note to AD's - he likes to work blue....

• ... 0f course, Will Muschamp is no Iron Sheik. Even Andrew "Dice" Clay thinks that the Iron Sheik is a little over the top with the twelve, ten, and four letter bombs.

• It should be noted that when the Iron Sheik takes a break from calling people mean names, that he does have thoughts on Tom Cruise and Hillary Clinton.

• In memory of the recently departed Fabulous Moolah, here's a women's battle royal from WWF TV circa 1985. Wrestling has made many advancements over the last 20 years, but without a doubt I feel the most signifcant one is the shift in aesthetics of the female participants. In 1985, the average female wrestler was a 55 year old, 200 LB, chain smoking tranny. In 2007, the average female wrestler is a 22 year old bikini model who is considered a failure if they haven't been in Playboy by their second year in the business. Enjoy.

• Speaking of Playboy, this might be the hottest weather reporter I've ever seen. Ken Hoffman, if you're reading this, please get her on your show.....

• Speaking of weather women, how's this for grace under pressure? And who is the marketing genius that comes up with the "WHIZ Storm Team"?

• This week's sign that we as a country have too much time on our hands -- this video has over 15 MILLION views. The last 20 seconds are scarier than any horror film you've ever seen.